The 5 funniest characters Police stories and student families

three men were flying over the ocean.  when their plane crashed on a mysterious island inhabited by Indians.  the men were knocked unconscious when they crashed but when they woke up they were faking Indian chiefs throne and so.

 he sat there and he said since we're a little humane I'm going to let you guys live but only if you could bring me ten of the same fruit and so.  the men went off and first, the first guy came back with ten apples he said here.  I' brought you the ten apples well now you must let me live' he said no but there is a second part now for my amusement you must shove all ten of. 

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the apples up your ass without making a facial expression so the guy got the first one up there but when they made.  the second one goes up there you started to cry you know sue and executed later and so the second guy got back but he had ten grapes this time he got all nine up there except.the last one but then he started laughing hysterically so he was soon killed later so the first guy I' met the second guy in heaven and he said hey man why'd you laugh so hard man you could have lived' if you only got that uh that last creep up there and he said well I couldn't help myself I saw the third guy coming with pineapples so this little ten-year-old kid is walking down.  the chute with a dead frog behind him on the string it looks like it's flat and so he walks up to. 

 the brothel and he knocks on the door and after a minute a woman answers and he says there what do you want kid he says I' want to sleep with one of your women and I got the money to pay and I'm so content I'm not going to sit there and leave until I do and the woman sat there and just I go okay fuck it fine and so she lets this' little boy in he sits there he asked. the woman he says missus do any of your women have diseases it's like of course not but he said well I've heard all.  the men in the neighborhood talking about how they got diseases after they made it with amber is that there that's the one I want she said alright okay fine then first door on the right and so he went down. 

women's sleeping 

the hallway on the first door on the right and after 10 minutes or so he came back and they sat there then when he paid.  the woman he's about to leave and so she sat there Willie before you leave me' I got asked you said well why would you why do you want to sleep with.  the woman so much why did you do this he's so well out of all the girls with diseases why'd you pick that one and so he said well' she is gonna give me a Z as you see when I get home my babysitter likes little boys and so she's gonna catch.

Family 

the disease and then when my dad takes the babysitter home he's gonna bone her and then he's gonna get.  the disease and then he's gonna come home and make love to my mom and then she's gonna get the disease and then in the morning when my dad goes to work.  the milkman is gonna being my mom and then he is gonna get the disease Cruz that's the fucking bastard that killed my frog so there are three robbers and these three robbers were robbing them all when the police were called and they had so little time.  the mall was locked down and so the men were running from the police now who has spotted them and they're running fast as they can be but the police sir was not far behind them they're running and our options to hide and soon they come across three sacks on the ground and so. 

the men get in the sex and sit there and wait for the police finally catch up to them and they sit there and see these three sexes sitting on the ground said HM that's pretty interesting and so.  the cop walks up to.  the first sack on the ground and he sits there and kicks it and he sits there and then bag goes Wolfie's like ah man I feel so bad I' just kicked her sack of puppies and sits there and he sees the second bag laying on. 

police

 the ground and so he walks up to it and he kicks it real hard and it sits there and goes meow meow's like ah man I' feel even worse I' just kicked a sack of kittens and so uh they see the third sex sitting down and sit there they walk' up and he kick it real hard think he kicks again nothing he kicks it real hard. this time it falls over and he sits there he goes he kicks really hard there's one more time necessary was a fuck you  I'm potatoes I'm not supposed to make a sound so there was a monkey in the jungle smoking a joint on a tree and when he was sitting there a little gecko came walking through the jungle and he sat there and he saw him and he said hey man wait what are you doing I'm theory what is that he said there will uh I'm smoking a joint bro you want one like your girls like sure why not so uh. the gecko climbs up the tree with the monkey and the monkey passes the gecko a joint and so then the monkey and the gecko are all together and they're smoking and so um he sits there and they're talking about life and.

 the gecko's mouth gets dry he's like a man my mouth is a dry man I need something to drink and so the monkey sits there and goes off and tells him you should go by.  the river and get a drink from there and so the gecko jumps down off the tree and starts going to go get a drink from the river he bends down to start sipping from the river and then falls in he starts to drown his bullshit oh shit man ah shit oh shit and this alligator comes up gives me some oh man what's going on oh man you okay and so uh.  the alligator sits there and picks him up and he sits there is that what happened man and the gecko tells him his whole life stories at all I was walking in the jungle and then I saw a monkey and I started smoking a boy with him and then my mouth got dry and I went to get water and then I fell in and now I'm here man and these that there wow that's pretty crazy I mean let me go talk to this monkey Bo so the alligator goes waddling through the jungle looking for the monkey and when he finds him in a tree smoking a joint my sisters is that holy shit bro how much water did you drink damn three men were out of town a German Frenchman and an American there were all three good friends and so they were in Saudi Arabia drinking some booze and they didn't know it. 

Life story 

the time but that is a pretty big offense in Saudi Arabia so the police rushed them at the moment and they sat there and got them and said you guys are gonna be punished to death because you were caught drinking and consuming it actually and so.  they went to court a few days later and since they all had really good lawyers that got it talked down to a life imprisonment and when they sat there they realized it was a Saudi holiday you sat there you know it I'm feeling nice guys so y'all are just gonna get 20 whip lashes all right and so the day of their 20 lashes comes me sit there and he's like oh man this is my wife's birthday she wants to give each and every one of you one wish and so. 

the three guys are lined up.  the German goes first and this is there what was your one wish gonna be sir he says they're well and he thought for a while he's you.  know it just type ill it's my beck the pillow only took ten of.  the lashes and then it cut through and he took the rest bleeding and crying he was carried away.  the Frenchman got up next he thought for a minute though you know it I want my wish to be two pillows to my back yeah and so uh they tied two pillows to his back but it only lasted for 15 and soon he was taken away crying and whimpering too.

Wife Birthday 

the American got up next and before he could get whipped and his wife of the with her he says those men I' love your culture your people your country is beautiful so amazing I' love it for that I will give you two wishes and so the American thought and with a big smile on face you know it I' want a hundred whiplashes and he sat there whoa you're so brave and if that's what you want to let it be as you want and you sat there and for your second wish and he smiled so big you could see his teeth he sat there to tie the French bastard to my back.